My world fractures and splinters…
Little spiders run across my eyes
Bringing snow and calm to my heart.
My world twists and turns…
Silvery cirrus clouds
Cover my mind
To hide all the sins and transgressions
I’ve ever committed.
My world fractures…
My mind splinters…
The shards of me fight for dominance:
Which piece of me is still me?
And which is a rejection of the uninvited transformation?
The agony of it all is searing,
Although there is no pain,
Even though I wish there were.
I watch myself disappear into the mist,
My shadow is licking the wall
In the last lusty embrace,
Screaming, here I am!
I am still here. I am alive.
Even if not for long…
The night descends like a spider
On its entwined prey,
Approaching slowly from a dark corner of my consciousness.
It knows, I am hers.
There is no escape.
I feel her sinking her fangs into my soft, unprotected neck.
My mind screams.
But in the end, I welcome the darkness
And the respite that it grants me
With my last breath.